Image from Pexels

Image from Pexels

Moving isn’t always black and white. There are pros and cons to it: fresh start, not knowing anyone, being in an unfamiliar environment, having room to explore, etc. I’m only a junior in high school, but I’ve already moved twice. If you’re moving soon, (maybe to college or a different high school), don’t be intimidated. Meeting new people isn’t as hard as you’d think.

Be Yourself

This is cheesey advice that almost everyone gets, but it’s extremely true. You’re more likely to find your true friends if you just act like yourself rather than sticking with a made-up personality. So stop reading those “how to be popular as the new kid in school” articles on wiki-how and just stick to your instincts. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t look for hobbies that are interesting to you. Take up reading, quilting, cooking – anything that you’re slightly interested in. And, if you find that boring, pick up a new hobby. Don’t worry about being passionate. You’ll find it somewhere along the way.

Keep In Touch With Your Old Friends While Connecting To New Friends

Social media is amazing and it is great at connecting to people, both old and new (and sometimes friends that you haven’t met #IRL before). Talk to your friends on Facebook, chat them, and even write them letters. Don’t be freaked out if you start losing touch with your old friends, though. You’re probably not going to be able to stay in touch will all of your friends because of busy schedules and because people change (and lots of other reasons, too). As with new friends, don’t be afraid to drop a “hello” in a Facebook chat or group. (What’s the worst thing that could happen?)

Remember People’s Name

Remembering names is hard, but there are lots of techniques to remember people’s names (my favorite is the Michael Scott method). There are tons of benefits of it, and it makes you seem like a friendlier person. So, if it only takes a mnemonic device for people to like you, then go for it.

Find Conversation Starters

If you’re naturally introverted and bad at conversation (like me), you might want to look up a few conversation starters. When asking questions, make questions broad and interesting – ask the person something that you can’t answer in one word. However, a few conversation starters feel too personal, such as “how many hours of sleep did you get last night?” and others feel too forced (“What’s your favorite shape? President?”). Use your own judgement when deciding which conversation starter to use. Some great overlooked conversation starters are compliments and asking to borrow things (be sure to return it though (!!!)). Also, people like to talk about themselves, so ask them questions about their own lives (not too weird or personal, though). If you hate small talk, just remember that sometimes small talk leads to ~*DEEP INTELLECTUAL CONVERSATIONS*~ in the future.

Join School Clubs That You’re Interested In

Chances are, your new school will have at least one club that you’re interested in (if there’s not start your own). Joining clubs will help you meet new people that share the same interests as you. It’s fun, social, and it’s a great way to learn more about a subject, other people, and yourself.

Find Your Friends

If you’re going to a big school (or sometimes a smaller school), it’s possible that many people will not even notice that you’re a new kid, so people aren’t going to try to befriend you. You have to take action and reach out to people yourself (again, what’s the worst that can happen?). Begin with a few conversation starters and be approachable (ie: put away that phone/book/etc).

Have An Open Mind

It’s strange how two completely opposite people can become friends.You might make friends with someone you immediately clicked with. You might make friends with someone you didn’t click with immediately (possibly disliked), and you might not. But it doesn’t hurt to give it a chance. That being said, don’t have unrealistically high expectations for your new friends because you may be disappointed. They’re just people, after all. (Reality isn’t as great as a movie about school where everything is okay in the end).

Remember, finding your true friends is a complicated thing, but you’ve got to let it happen naturally. Don’t fret making friends because it will happen naturally (and if not internet friends will do).

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the author

Lily Lou is a writer and student living in Atlanta. In her free time she likes to make lists, learn random things, and watch the Cooking Channel. You can reach her at, her twitter (@countingteacups), her instagram (counting_teacups), or

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