You read that correctly. This article will teach you the fine art of procrastinating.
I know what you’re thinking. Why would we need to learn how to procrastinate? There are already thousands of perfectly suitable procrastinators in the world. Well this article is for the other hundred or so students who have motivation, work ethic and self-control.
Always have to finish assignments as soon as possible? We’ll break that habit. Have the annoying tendency to put homework before fun? We can fix that. Are you an over-achiever who needs a distraction? Well, these diversions will help you break your concentration and become an AP (Advanced Procrastinator) student.
This is the largest type of distractions and the most easily accessible. If you are a college student, you most likely do your homework on your laptop. Perfect! Now, before you open a document or your email, type in whatever social media you use (and if you don’t have any, you’re already failing at procrastinating.) Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Tumblr or Vine are suggested for the social-media-oblivious.
Once you have logged on, the key now is to stay on. Tweeting, scrolling and posting are all acceptable actions at this point. Watching videos (or making your own) are also suggested. Depending on your preference, YouTube will be the easiest website to distract you for hours on end. It offers almost every type of entertainment—even educational for those still wary about procrastination. Music lovers can sing their hearts out to “Let It Go” or “I’m So Fancy” with covers and karaoke options. There is just about anything for anyone who is a beginner or professional at finding distractions.
Avoid any productive site or program (that means no Microsoft or email.) As soon as you have mastered this, you are one step closer to becoming an advanced procrastinator.
Similar, yet not quite the same as social media, communication is also another way to put off homework. While talking on the phone has almost become obsolete these days, texting or chatting through social media are growing. Friends or no longer inaccessible once you go home from school.
Cell phones are key to this type of distraction. You don’t even have to log into a computer, just simply go to your contacts and start texting a random person on your phone. These conversations can be the most time consuming and rewarding. All that’s required is “hey” sent to five people, and you are set for the next three hours.
The downfall of this is if you are a new to procrastination and your friends don’t approve of this habit, they may shut down the conversation. They key is to not mention homework, essays or anything school related. This way you have a pure, education-free exchange.
This is the oldest method in the book. Watching TV shows or movies are easy ways to waste away the hours. Turn on your favorite station and you’re set for at least another half hour.
While not all college students have access to TV, a miracle website called Netflix has saved all of our lives. This website makes almost any TV show available at any time. Game of Thrones fans? You’re welcome.
This type of distraction is harder, but worth while in the end. Books steal you into another world, another life. And if you find the right one, you won’t be able to put it down. Once you find it, you’ve just spent a whole day procrastinating.
While it may be hard to find that special book, reading also includes magazines, tabloids or even (gasp) the newspaper. Those academically inclined can spend hours pouring over articles about the Royal Baby’s first birthday or the situation in the Ukraine. Reading really is the most time consuming of distractions, but it takes some focus to keep reading.
A favorite of many a college student, naps can be your best friend when it comes to procrastinating (and it’s also good for your health.) Anyone can do it, and it is only a matter of time before you end up passed out on your bed anyway, so why not give in to the temptation?
Maybe once you’re awake enough, that essay will flow more easily or the math homework will be more understandable.