College is an entire new chapter of your life that is just waiting to be discovered. It’s a fresh start from everything and everyone that has been preparing us all just for this very moment in time. Even though we may have had plenty of guidance and advice from others in hope of helping us getting through the first few years of college, many of us are most definitely not prepared for the other half of college.
I’m not talking about the books, the hours of studying, the exams, or new professors, but the harsh reality that comes with college and our new responsibilities. It’s not just about the drama of new relationships that we build as well as relationships that we burn, I’m talking all about the cliques.
A clique is a group of people, usually who are friends that are often used when discussing stereotypes. Cliques are all around us, even at exceptionally young ages. They are everywhere, and they do not disappear especially when we get to college. College is a time period during our lives where we find ourselves. It’s when we figure out what careers we want to pursue and how it is going to effect what future that’s in store for us based on our actions today.
College is when we think about the future responsibilities and not just about the life we live right now where we only think about the next few days ahead of us like, what we are going to do with our friends this weekend. College is a lot to handle but, you should enjoy every minute of it. You should not have to be worrying about the people who put you down or make you feel unwanted. They do not deserve that satisfaction. It is not going to be easy, and it will not happen over night but do not worry everyone has been here before, you are not the only one.
If you ask anyone, we can all agree with the fact that college is no easy task, especially when you have people who are against you and even bringing you down. If you have ever had any issues with cliques, or not fitting in with a certain group of people, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. When people say, “popularity is everything”, that’s an impeccable example of a fake hype. Everyone has their own battle against these kind of people and their precious cliques. The saddest thing about any kind of clique, is that they never go away or just disappear after we reach a certain age. There are adult cliques too, especially in the workforce. We can not control the cliques, or who they include and do not include. But, we CAN control how we (as an individual) deal with them.
The old saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but, words can never hurt me” has a lot of truth behind it. The truth is, words can hurt. They can hurt a lot more than we ever expected them too, only if we continue allowing them to do so. We need to stop allowing these people and their harsh words win the satisfaction of destroying our self-esteem. We (as in you) need to identify what you are truly feeling when people put you down and make you feel unwanted instead of widening the circle of gossip and outrage. You are the only one that can stop these cliques and every little bit of negativity they have to offer. Only you can identify what you are feeling and how you should react so you can then go on to becoming the strong, confident, and successful human being you desire to be.
Here are some helpful tips to cope with cliques:
1. Ignore all of their negativity. If you continue to show interest in anything they have to say, they will not stop.
2. Stand tall. Show them that you do not need them in your life, and you can be perfectly fine without them.
3. Do not turn to something unhealthy as a method of coping. Do not turn to the fattening foods, depression, and especially drugs. Using those unhealthy things as a way of coping with not being accepted shows them how weak they really perceive you to be, and it will only continue to hurt yourself much more than it would ever hurt them.
4. Is it really worth it? If after some time you are finally “worthy” of being apart of any clique, it might not be everything you have desired it to be in the first place. Why should you be apart of their clique now after all of this time? You should never have to change your personality to fit with some other group of people. You are who you are, and if they can not except that, it is truly their lost.
5. Be powerful, their words can no longer hurt. Show your inner strength and kill them with kindness.
6. Taking the high road can hurt. At least sometimes in situations similar to this, it feels like it hurts more than it helps, but that is not true at all. Just remember, no matter what you say to cliques may not always be enough for them, and that does not mean that you are not good enough for them. It means that they are most definitely not good enough for you, or even worth being apart of your life.
You are an amazing person, and never let anyone tell you different.