Between all of our insane amounts of wisdom about choosing a school and the ridiculous number of SAT posts star writer Lili Borland has been pumping out lately, we’ve been slacking on the FUN posts! So today we have a treat for you! High school seniors: I promise you you’ll have a couple of these kids in your graduation class.
1. The Guy Who Got into an Ivy League School and Never Lets Anyone Forget It
We get it. I mean, you’re wearing a Harvard sweatshirt…and sweatpants…and t-shirt…Oh, what’s that? Your Bah-stan coffee straight from Cambridge, Massachusetts came in a Harvard thermos? Funny how that worked out…Tips if you’re this person: STOP. I promise you people are making jokes when you’re not around.
2. The Girl Who Caught a Case of Senioritis…Freshman Year
Skipping class, eating breakfast for all three meals, wearing sweatpants and Uggs to school, this is THE LIFE. Everyone waits for that moment of, “It’s second semester, I’m in college, and I’M DONE.” But some of us start that process a little earlier…like, three years too early.
3. The Guy Who Got into the College No One’s Heard Of
I know your pain, dude. Trust me. If I got a quarter every time I was asked if I go to Ohio Wesleyan or Virginia Wesleyan, I could fix my Wesleyan’s financial aid problems.
4. The Guy Who Wears Conflicting College Apparel
I don’t know about you guys, but there was one guy in my class who was waitlisted at two different schools he loved, so instead of holding off on buying college attire, he bought clothing from BOTH schools. Nothing is more confusing than wearing a UPenn sweatshirt and Princeton sweatpants…
5. The Girl Who Shows Up Late for First Period Every Single Day
Well, I mean, it’s extremely important to pick up that double shot espresso mocha latte soy cappuccino frappe Tazo coffee drink thing before heading to English class 20 minutes late. Besides, what are you missing at that point? Dante? Who gives a flying crap about Dante and the 239429384293 circles of Hell?
6. The Guy Who Takes the Senior Prank Eighteen Steps Too Far
Sure, putting Vaseline on the locks of the underclassmen lockers is funny. Smashing those lockers to pieces with an axe? Not so much…
7. The Girl Who Starts Reminiscing about High School…Before You Graduate
Awwwwww, remember that time in math class where you all didn’t understand the homework problems so you complained to the teacher and said you wouldn’t do them unless she explained them better, but she told you to suck it up and do the homework anyway? Oh wait, that’s happening RIGHT NOW…